Anne Rice (author of the Vampire Chronicles, etc) asked on Facebook if readers would post their thoughts/experiences on the health care system in the US. Here is what I posted:
"I feel that coverage for everyone is important, as well no limits on "lifetime benefits". I've had moderate to severe asthma most of my life, and when I was age 11, my parents starting talking to me every so often about how I needed to ha...ve a good career with good group health insurance benefits when I "grew up", because there was no way that I would ever qualify for health insurance on my own. I think this really scared them. I was fortunately able to do just that. However, my first son was born with severe heart and lung defects. . . we were able to add him to both of our insurance companies. . . when he died at almost 4 months old (he was our little fighter!), he'd just about maxed out his lifetime benefits for his primary insurance, well on the way of maxing out the secondary insurance. Parents should not have to ever be in that kind of position!"
Thursday, November 4, 2010
Sunday, July 4, 2010
4th of July and Boston Med (HLHS)
I know where I was and who I was with most of my life on every 4th of July. . . and I just remembered that three years ago, my DH and I were living back in Illinois, and we took our little grill and cooked out near Lake Michigan (boy, I really miss the lake). We watched the fireworks from there, too. I remember being worried that the noise would hurt the baby. Other than that, we were surpremely happy. My all-day sickness had finally abated mostly, and I was just starting to feel the baby oh, so occaisonally. We were looking forward to seeing our baby. It was a month later that we found out that Sam had HLHS (but didn't know about his other problems yet).
And then a couple of nights ago, my husband and I started watching Boston Med. This was in part because apparently my husband accidently walked in on a film crew from the show when he was at work sometime in the last couple of months. (They followed up a doctor who was in Boston and then moved here.) We had to turn it off after the first 15 minutes or so.
They followed a couple whose first baby was also diagnosed with HLHS in utero. We were somewhat okay with this until the mom said that her son's name was Sam. I started crying and my husband turned off the tv. I was fine with that, until my curiousity got the best of me. . . I had to look them up online to "see what happened".
I have to be honest. . . I was rather hoping their Sam would die, too. (Apparently he's gone through the first two surgeries - the Norwood and the Glenn- and has done well since his birth, etc, was filmed last year.) I felt and still feel so guilty for hoping that. I asked my husband - "Why do THEY get to keep their Sam and we don't?? And why didn't they feature a baby with HLHS who doesn't make it?"
My husband oh so helpfully pointed out that because it's a 'reality' medical show, it's going to be "cheesy" -- they are not going to feature a baby who eventually dies because more defects, such as a non-functioning lung, aren't discovered until he's six weeks old, or die from bleed-outs after procedures (like OUR Sam).
Thanks, I feel a little better now.
And then a couple of nights ago, my husband and I started watching Boston Med. This was in part because apparently my husband accidently walked in on a film crew from the show when he was at work sometime in the last couple of months. (They followed up a doctor who was in Boston and then moved here.) We had to turn it off after the first 15 minutes or so.
They followed a couple whose first baby was also diagnosed with HLHS in utero. We were somewhat okay with this until the mom said that her son's name was Sam. I started crying and my husband turned off the tv. I was fine with that, until my curiousity got the best of me. . . I had to look them up online to "see what happened".
I have to be honest. . . I was rather hoping their Sam would die, too. (Apparently he's gone through the first two surgeries - the Norwood and the Glenn- and has done well since his birth, etc, was filmed last year.) I felt and still feel so guilty for hoping that. I asked my husband - "Why do THEY get to keep their Sam and we don't?? And why didn't they feature a baby with HLHS who doesn't make it?"
My husband oh so helpfully pointed out that because it's a 'reality' medical show, it's going to be "cheesy" -- they are not going to feature a baby who eventually dies because more defects, such as a non-functioning lung, aren't discovered until he's six weeks old, or die from bleed-outs after procedures (like OUR Sam).
Thanks, I feel a little better now.
Saturday, May 15, 2010
N at 2 months
Tomorrow N is two months old already!
In the last 24 hours, it has taken even longer to feed him, because he hasn't just started looking around and getting distracted while eating, but now he will sometimes "unlatch" and smile up at me. . . letting me know he's happy. It's so sweet and makes ME feel so good that I don't mind the feedings taking longer!
Today, I observed N noticing his hand. He was staring it, nearly cross-eyed, intently for a good minute or so.
He loves still to look up at the mirror that above him on his cradle swing (both the swing and the mirror are lovely inventions for fussy babies. . .)
He "talks" all the time now. . . not just cooing but other noises, too.
We received our order of cloth diapers - to give cloth diapering a try - yesterday. I had been dithering over the decision to try some since before N was born. I ran them several times in hot to prepare them as per the instructions. They soak just fine now. I think we'll do the "pure and natural" disposables at night yet, for now. Cloth diapers are bulkier on Nick, but that's okay. . . this kind of bulk is rather cute!
In the last 24 hours, it has taken even longer to feed him, because he hasn't just started looking around and getting distracted while eating, but now he will sometimes "unlatch" and smile up at me. . . letting me know he's happy. It's so sweet and makes ME feel so good that I don't mind the feedings taking longer!
Today, I observed N noticing his hand. He was staring it, nearly cross-eyed, intently for a good minute or so.
He loves still to look up at the mirror that above him on his cradle swing (both the swing and the mirror are lovely inventions for fussy babies. . .)
He "talks" all the time now. . . not just cooing but other noises, too.
We received our order of cloth diapers - to give cloth diapering a try - yesterday. I had been dithering over the decision to try some since before N was born. I ran them several times in hot to prepare them as per the instructions. They soak just fine now. I think we'll do the "pure and natural" disposables at night yet, for now. Cloth diapers are bulkier on Nick, but that's okay. . . this kind of bulk is rather cute!
Friday, May 14, 2010
N and Sam
N is "talking", cooing, smiling, giggling, and trying to laugh. He's moving his arms and legs with more directed action, and delighting in it. He is just about 24 inches long -- which means he is the length Sam was at when he died. Sam didn't weigh as much as Nick - who is now 12 lbs -- but in those few pictures of us holding Sam after he died, Sam looks so bloated compared to N alive. Sam had been pumped full of all sorts of things as they tried to keep him alive for nearly three hours. N looked "pudgy" a few days ago, but now doesn't so much anymore. . . he's moving!
N is passing Sam up in everything now. Except in hair. . . Sam had lots of hair that he never lost. N is still rather bald-ish in comparison. . . so Sam will never lose that distinction!
N is passing Sam up in everything now. Except in hair. . . Sam had lots of hair that he never lost. N is still rather bald-ish in comparison. . . so Sam will never lose that distinction!
Sunday, May 9, 2010
Sign from Sam on Mother's Day?
Today, I was with my dad, who is visiting, and N at a local farmer's market. There was a group with guitars, singing. When we walked by, they started a song. It was "You Are My Sunshine". I haven't allowed myself to ever sing this song to N - especially because we sang it for Sam at his funeral. I started crying and my dad hugged me. It was a beautiful rendition we heard today. Maybe it was a message from Sam that we are never truly apart, and that he is happy that N is here. I think that Sam sent us Nick to love and hold.
Saturday, May 1, 2010
Facebook Status Updates from the last six weeks
May 1: "Oh, great. There IS such thing as post-partum carpal tunnel syndrome -- mostly in nursing mothers. Years of typing and playing handbells didn't cause it. . . my beautiful baby caused it (indirectly) instead!"
April 30: "Looking forward to B's day off, so maybe he can be up for hours in the early morning with the baby. 4.5 hours of sleep total for me last night. What happened to that couple of weeks of several more hours of sleep per night??"
April 29: " ahhh, he's asleep. Off to bed!"
April 29: "Why are our early morning feeding/changing sessions lasting over an hour the last few days? He keeps going (so multiple diaper changes in a very short time), and also eating very, very slowly - and yet he acts famished. Eating slowly and savoring?"
April 27: "We have been loaned a cradle swing. Part off it is being washed right now, so Nick hasn't tried it yet . . . and this this is the first afternoon in a few weeks that Nick went to sleep for an afternoon nap without going on a long walk (and not being moved at all). Go figure."
April 26: "Nick is six weeks old, and for the first time, he is upstairs in bed and I am downstairs doing a few things before I head to bed. I am anxious and have the movement/sound monitor on. So far, he's fine. Usually, so far, if I am downstairs he is downstairs, etc, so this is different."
April 26: "Nick is starting to scootch himself to reach things, while on his back. . . and still doesn't like tummy time."
April 24: " Nick seems to like showers better than baths - today, anyway."
April 21: "Nick gained another 11 oz in the last week. . . he is almost 3 lbs over birth weight at five weeks and 1 day old. Is this too much?"
April 19: " Insatiable, insatiable baby! He's been eating for three out of the last four hours. . . ounces and ounces. . . what to do?"
April 19: " Baby Status Update #17: Nick nearly slept through his first visit to Sabino Canyon!"
April 19: "I had eight entire hours of sleep overnight (although they weren't quite contiguous) -- the baby slept from 8:30 pm to 6:30 am, only getting up once to eat an enormous amount!"
April 16: "Nick is one month old already!"
April 15: "Baby has been awake and crying for hours. We are taking a nice long walk since he wants to move. He is almost napping. Oops. Stopped moving for too long."
April 14: " Baby Status Update #16: Nick has gained another pound in the last week. . . so he's gained two pounds since two weeks ago! Wow."
April 13: "Baby Status Update #15: Nick is currently loving the vibrating bouncer (and is looking at the dangling animals) - this is the first time in over two hours that I have been able to put him down. Last night, he decided he did not want to be swaddled, and would not go to sleep until I unswaddled him."
April 12: " Gassy, crying baby. Maybe mommy shouldn't eat spicy food. . ."
April 10: "Baby Status Update #14: Nick just Skyped with his Grandma and Grandpa Jaberg. . . well, on our end."
April 7: "Baby Status Update #13: Nick has gained another 4.5 oz in two days, which puts him at a weight gain of an entire pound in one week!"
April 6: "A little gentleman lying in my lap is still awake at 11 pm. Last night was an aberration (asleep at 10:30 pm) apparently."
April 5: "Baby Status Update #12: Nick went to his first handbell rehearsal (well, since he was born - he grew in his mom hearing bells up to the week before he was born) tonight - and slept peacefully right through it! He also "held" his first bells. . . a picture will be posted soon."
April 5: "Baby Status Update #11: Nick now weighs 8lbs, 6 oz!!"
April 4: "Baby status update #10: Nick seems to be saying, "Forget these pastels - give me this afghan instead, that has the dark blue, purple and white stripes.""
April 4: "Baby status update #9: It is 9 pm, so Nick is awake now. He is looking at me with his eyes that look like mine, his grandpa's and his great-grandpa's. And he just ate an incredible amount. And we didn't feel the earthquake today."
April 3: "A very awake, insatiable baby at 11:15 pm. A very tired mommy. We probably won't go to the 6 am sunrise service tomorrow."
March 30: "Baby Status Update #8(??): Our little Nick baby is presently milk-drunk. ♥ "
March 30: "Delighting in the baby sleeping on my lap!"
March 29: "just took Nick out in public in the snugli carrier we were given. He was fine in it but was mistaken for a girl because of the bit of pink decor on it."
March 28: "Baby Status Update #7: It seemed like Nick was starting to work out the night and day thing. . . except now he's awake at almost three am instead of earlier in the night. Mommy's tried singing to him and everything. . . but he seems perfectly happy being awake (but Mommy has to hold him.)"
March 26: "Baby Status Update #6: Nick has gained 6 ounces in four days!"
March 24: "Baby Update Status #5: Nick is hearing in the background, Tales of Hoffman (opera) on PBS."
March 23: "Baby Update Status #4: Nick went on his first walk today in his stroller -- to the mailbox!"
March 22: "Baby status update #3: Nick was up from 8 pm to 3:30 am last night and went through 10+ diaper changes. He wanted to eat continuously and wet himself completely nearly every fifteen minutes. Normal?"
March 22: "Baby status update #2: We created a Mii for Nick, and weighed him using Baby Stats on the Wii Fit. According to this, he has gained a few ounces back since we left the hospital. Yay!"
March 21: "Baby status update #1: In the last 24 hours, he managed to fill his entire hamper completely. The washer is running."
April 30: "Looking forward to B's day off, so maybe he can be up for hours in the early morning with the baby. 4.5 hours of sleep total for me last night. What happened to that couple of weeks of several more hours of sleep per night??"
April 29: " ahhh, he's asleep. Off to bed!"
April 29: "Why are our early morning feeding/changing sessions lasting over an hour the last few days? He keeps going (so multiple diaper changes in a very short time), and also eating very, very slowly - and yet he acts famished. Eating slowly and savoring?"
April 27: "We have been loaned a cradle swing. Part off it is being washed right now, so Nick hasn't tried it yet . . . and this this is the first afternoon in a few weeks that Nick went to sleep for an afternoon nap without going on a long walk (and not being moved at all). Go figure."
April 26: "Nick is six weeks old, and for the first time, he is upstairs in bed and I am downstairs doing a few things before I head to bed. I am anxious and have the movement/sound monitor on. So far, he's fine. Usually, so far, if I am downstairs he is downstairs, etc, so this is different."
April 26: "Nick is starting to scootch himself to reach things, while on his back. . . and still doesn't like tummy time."
April 24: " Nick seems to like showers better than baths - today, anyway."
April 21: "Nick gained another 11 oz in the last week. . . he is almost 3 lbs over birth weight at five weeks and 1 day old. Is this too much?"
April 19: " Insatiable, insatiable baby! He's been eating for three out of the last four hours. . . ounces and ounces. . . what to do?"
April 19: " Baby Status Update #17: Nick nearly slept through his first visit to Sabino Canyon!"
April 19: "I had eight entire hours of sleep overnight (although they weren't quite contiguous) -- the baby slept from 8:30 pm to 6:30 am, only getting up once to eat an enormous amount!"
April 16: "Nick is one month old already!"
April 15: "Baby has been awake and crying for hours. We are taking a nice long walk since he wants to move. He is almost napping. Oops. Stopped moving for too long."
April 14: " Baby Status Update #16: Nick has gained another pound in the last week. . . so he's gained two pounds since two weeks ago! Wow."
April 13: "Baby Status Update #15: Nick is currently loving the vibrating bouncer (and is looking at the dangling animals) - this is the first time in over two hours that I have been able to put him down. Last night, he decided he did not want to be swaddled, and would not go to sleep until I unswaddled him."
April 12: " Gassy, crying baby. Maybe mommy shouldn't eat spicy food. . ."
April 10: "Baby Status Update #14: Nick just Skyped with his Grandma and Grandpa Jaberg. . . well, on our end."
April 7: "Baby Status Update #13: Nick has gained another 4.5 oz in two days, which puts him at a weight gain of an entire pound in one week!"
April 6: "A little gentleman lying in my lap is still awake at 11 pm. Last night was an aberration (asleep at 10:30 pm) apparently."
April 5: "Baby Status Update #12: Nick went to his first handbell rehearsal (well, since he was born - he grew in his mom hearing bells up to the week before he was born) tonight - and slept peacefully right through it! He also "held" his first bells. . . a picture will be posted soon."
April 5: "Baby Status Update #11: Nick now weighs 8lbs, 6 oz!!"
April 4: "Baby status update #10: Nick seems to be saying, "Forget these pastels - give me this afghan instead, that has the dark blue, purple and white stripes.""
April 4: "Baby status update #9: It is 9 pm, so Nick is awake now. He is looking at me with his eyes that look like mine, his grandpa's and his great-grandpa's. And he just ate an incredible amount. And we didn't feel the earthquake today."
April 3: "A very awake, insatiable baby at 11:15 pm. A very tired mommy. We probably won't go to the 6 am sunrise service tomorrow."
March 30: "Baby Status Update #8(??): Our little Nick baby is presently milk-drunk. ♥ "
March 30: "Delighting in the baby sleeping on my lap!"
March 29: "just took Nick out in public in the snugli carrier we were given. He was fine in it but was mistaken for a girl because of the bit of pink decor on it."
March 28: "Baby Status Update #7: It seemed like Nick was starting to work out the night and day thing. . . except now he's awake at almost three am instead of earlier in the night. Mommy's tried singing to him and everything. . . but he seems perfectly happy being awake (but Mommy has to hold him.)"
March 26: "Baby Status Update #6: Nick has gained 6 ounces in four days!"
March 24: "Baby Update Status #5: Nick is hearing in the background, Tales of Hoffman (opera) on PBS."
March 23: "Baby Update Status #4: Nick went on his first walk today in his stroller -- to the mailbox!"
March 22: "Baby status update #3: Nick was up from 8 pm to 3:30 am last night and went through 10+ diaper changes. He wanted to eat continuously and wet himself completely nearly every fifteen minutes. Normal?"
March 22: "Baby status update #2: We created a Mii for Nick, and weighed him using Baby Stats on the Wii Fit. According to this, he has gained a few ounces back since we left the hospital. Yay!"
March 21: "Baby status update #1: In the last 24 hours, he managed to fill his entire hamper completely. The washer is running."
Friday, April 30, 2010
Postpartum Anxiety
What I posted in a message board this morning:
I went a Postpartum support group meeting a couple of days ago, and there I learned that there IS such a thing as Postpartum Anxiety and Postpartum OCD. Apparently I have more signs of these things than Postpartum Depression. Nick is over six weeks old now, and these things are getting worse.
Also, Nick was sleeping so well, and had a really nice night schedule for a few weeks. He would sleep for a 4.5 hour stretch, eat around 4 am or so, and then go right back to sleep for at least another 3 hours. I was getting at least 7 hours of sleep at night. For the last two nights, he's been waking up at different times, and then taken TWO hours to eat and go back to sleep. Apparently he is just getting distracted by looking at me and looking around. Also, some diarrhea, so I have to change his diaper three times sometimes before he will go to sleep again.
So the lack of sleep, plus my constant worry, plus the fact that at night I panic when I can't find my flashlight so that I look to check Nick's breathing a minimum of five times before I feel "free" to go to sleep. I have an overwhelming feeling that if I don't check constantly, something will happen to him (he will die) to punish me for not doing something right. I am constantly wondering/asking "what if? what if? what if?" until I am on the edge of constant panic all the time.
My husband, who had been against me going back on an SSRI until we were completely done having children (we're not - we'd like one more - but won't try again until next year at the earliest), because my being on a certain one during conception of our first PERHAPS played a role his defects. . . has finally admitted that maybe I need to go back on something, at least for a few months. (I want to. . . and I had been telling him that. I need to do something.) I was vocalizing my constant "worry thoughts" to him last night. I couldn't stop. He finally realized that there is a problem.
I was on SSRIs for anxiety, not depression, years ago in the first place. This anxiety I am experiencing now feels magnified greatly compared to then!
I have a doctor's appt next week to further discuss the SSRI option. I am partially breastfeeding my son - I don't make enough - but he gets between 7 and 11 ounces of breastmilk a day, and the rest is formula - so the plus would be that I wouldn't have to worry about him getting to much of the med, but I still worry about his developing little brain with the very little he'd get.
I went a Postpartum support group meeting a couple of days ago, and there I learned that there IS such a thing as Postpartum Anxiety and Postpartum OCD. Apparently I have more signs of these things than Postpartum Depression. Nick is over six weeks old now, and these things are getting worse.
Also, Nick was sleeping so well, and had a really nice night schedule for a few weeks. He would sleep for a 4.5 hour stretch, eat around 4 am or so, and then go right back to sleep for at least another 3 hours. I was getting at least 7 hours of sleep at night. For the last two nights, he's been waking up at different times, and then taken TWO hours to eat and go back to sleep. Apparently he is just getting distracted by looking at me and looking around. Also, some diarrhea, so I have to change his diaper three times sometimes before he will go to sleep again.
So the lack of sleep, plus my constant worry, plus the fact that at night I panic when I can't find my flashlight so that I look to check Nick's breathing a minimum of five times before I feel "free" to go to sleep. I have an overwhelming feeling that if I don't check constantly, something will happen to him (he will die) to punish me for not doing something right. I am constantly wondering/asking "what if? what if? what if?" until I am on the edge of constant panic all the time.
My husband, who had been against me going back on an SSRI until we were completely done having children (we're not - we'd like one more - but won't try again until next year at the earliest), because my being on a certain one during conception of our first PERHAPS played a role his defects. . . has finally admitted that maybe I need to go back on something, at least for a few months. (I want to. . . and I had been telling him that. I need to do something.) I was vocalizing my constant "worry thoughts" to him last night. I couldn't stop. He finally realized that there is a problem.
I was on SSRIs for anxiety, not depression, years ago in the first place. This anxiety I am experiencing now feels magnified greatly compared to then!
I have a doctor's appt next week to further discuss the SSRI option. I am partially breastfeeding my son - I don't make enough - but he gets between 7 and 11 ounces of breastmilk a day, and the rest is formula - so the plus would be that I wouldn't have to worry about him getting to much of the med, but I still worry about his developing little brain with the very little he'd get.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
Oddest Things I Said At the Hospital. . . but others may understand. . .
Nickrooz (N)was born on March 16, 2010. He weighed 7lbs, 12oz and was 20 inches long. At two weeks old today, he is now 7lbs, 10 oz, and 21 inches long. He lost nearly a pound in the first week after being born, but he is steadily gaining it back!
Nickrooz means "Good Day" in persian. Very appropriate, we think.
So. . .
During the c-section, while I was still on the table and they were finishing up with me, I asked my husband if N's testes were descended (Sam's weren't). They are, but my dear husband thought that was a weird question!
The next day I said to the hospital social worker that N is "well oxygenated"! I don't think they hear that very often, if at all, come out of the mouth of a mother about her baby.
These were some "odd" things I remember saying at the hospital.
I will post more soon on N's progress. . .
Nickrooz means "Good Day" in persian. Very appropriate, we think.
So. . .
During the c-section, while I was still on the table and they were finishing up with me, I asked my husband if N's testes were descended (Sam's weren't). They are, but my dear husband thought that was a weird question!
The next day I said to the hospital social worker that N is "well oxygenated"! I don't think they hear that very often, if at all, come out of the mouth of a mother about her baby.
These were some "odd" things I remember saying at the hospital.
I will post more soon on N's progress. . .
Thursday, March 11, 2010
Appt today - 38weeks, 2 days - less than five days to go
I had what I thought was going to be a "borning" appointment with the nurse practicioner today. I totally broke down and told her my worries about N moving too little or too much; my worries about lots of liquid-y discharge a couple of nights ago and how when I called the office, I was routed to voicemail again and no one called back; my worries about my yeast infection - that I'd been using the Monistat as directed.
She checked me and said that my yeast infection is horrible, and would give me something stronger than the cream. That I didn't seem to have ruptured my water. They checked - I am still not leaking amniotic fluid, despite lots of discharge. I am dilated almost 1 cm. She had me finally do a NST. I was on the monitors for over an hour, because N refused to wake up and move. His resting heartrate was lovely, but he wasn't reacting. After nearly an hour and a huge cup of cold water and an entire bottle of orange juice, N moved and got an active heartrate a couple of time. If he hadn't done that, they would have sent me to L&D for further monitoring. In addition, they gave me the direct extension to a nurse who will answer in person during office hours. I left feeling better.
She checked me and said that my yeast infection is horrible, and would give me something stronger than the cream. That I didn't seem to have ruptured my water. They checked - I am still not leaking amniotic fluid, despite lots of discharge. I am dilated almost 1 cm. She had me finally do a NST. I was on the monitors for over an hour, because N refused to wake up and move. His resting heartrate was lovely, but he wasn't reacting. After nearly an hour and a huge cup of cold water and an entire bottle of orange juice, N moved and got an active heartrate a couple of time. If he hadn't done that, they would have sent me to L&D for further monitoring. In addition, they gave me the direct extension to a nurse who will answer in person during office hours. I left feeling better.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
Less than Six Days
Less than six days. . . wow.
On the 11 am news on a local station just now - why c-sections are bad.
Um, I've already had one c-section. Also, this little guy still hasn't dropped completely yet, either. Sam never did, either.
I think I will be having a c-section anyway. Besides my DH is a health professional. He's very conscious of complications. . . so if I have one, he will be on top of it and advocate for me.
On the 11 am news on a local station just now - why c-sections are bad.
Um, I've already had one c-section. Also, this little guy still hasn't dropped completely yet, either. Sam never did, either.
I think I will be having a c-section anyway. Besides my DH is a health professional. He's very conscious of complications. . . so if I have one, he will be on top of it and advocate for me.
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
38 WEEKS!! NEXT WEEK
Okay, the c-section is scheduled for next week this morning! Less than seven days away. . . oh, boy! I am getting a little nervous, but can I be more nervous than I am now about worrying about everything about my new little guy. . . is he okay in there, is his placenta still good? His cord? Even my husband is getting nervous again. . . is N's lungs okay? That's what they were not able to check on ultrasound.
N keeps moving a lot. He's still very responsive if I "tap" on him, or play music on his little mp3 player. He seems to really like it when "mommy" eats something, too.
N keeps moving a lot. He's still very responsive if I "tap" on him, or play music on his little mp3 player. He seems to really like it when "mommy" eats something, too.
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Almost 38 weeks. . . movement, thoughts, new craving
It's Saturday, c-section is planned for 10 days from now, and I am having something of a "nesting" urge coming back. Well, in terms of the baby's "room", I haven't lost the nesting instinct, but the cleaning urges I had back in November and December have been slow in returning. I've actually done some cleaning, organizing, sorting in the rest of the apartment! I think I am almost to the point of. . . what if I actually do go into labor before the c-section? I want to have it relatively clean in here!
N has been moving regularly today. I love, love, LOVE feeling him move. Yes, sometimes when he keeps me up at night with his movements I am not so sure, but now that it's getting toward the end of this pregnancy, I am trying to savor feeling him move inside me.
I am also working on birth announcements. . . I've been addressing envelopes, printing the quotes for the front of the cards, and using my calligraphy pen in the inside for his name, etc.
Maybe one last strange craving? I have been craving cumin in my food lately. I used to not really care for it, but it tastes wonderful right now! Cumin supposedly may be one of those spices that can cause miscarriage or pre-term labor, but that's not a worry for me now!!
N has been moving regularly today. I love, love, LOVE feeling him move. Yes, sometimes when he keeps me up at night with his movements I am not so sure, but now that it's getting toward the end of this pregnancy, I am trying to savor feeling him move inside me.
I am also working on birth announcements. . . I've been addressing envelopes, printing the quotes for the front of the cards, and using my calligraphy pen in the inside for his name, etc.
Maybe one last strange craving? I have been craving cumin in my food lately. I used to not really care for it, but it tastes wonderful right now! Cumin supposedly may be one of those spices that can cause miscarriage or pre-term labor, but that's not a worry for me now!!
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Another small shower today. . .
I had another small shower thrown for me today. An organization that I belong to has a "sub" group of moms who run a playgroup. Well, they wanted to throw a shower for me! So, I agreed. They all gave us mostly useful stuff. . . and actually included the gifts receipts in most cases for "just in case". I think they actually know to do that, as young mothers. (Unlike others recently who have decided they didn't like the "practicality" of our registry and just went on their own to give us gifts - without a gift receipt - for things we already have plenty of. . . I don't mean to sound ungrateful, but sometimes it gets a little frustrating.) Anyway, they gave us some cute little outfits for the 3 to 9 month size ranges, which we actually needed, some little hangers which we also needed, wipes, diapers, etc. It was fun, and I look forward to doing the "mommy" thing and going on playdates with N.
I had another OBGYN appt today, after the shower. N's heartrate was 140. He was moving and wiggling pretty regularly all day. My doctor did inform me that I have vaginal bacteriosis, and sent in a prescription. I do not have Group Strep B, so we don't have to worry about that at this point.
11 more days?? Just about. . .
I had another OBGYN appt today, after the shower. N's heartrate was 140. He was moving and wiggling pretty regularly all day. My doctor did inform me that I have vaginal bacteriosis, and sent in a prescription. I do not have Group Strep B, so we don't have to worry about that at this point.
11 more days?? Just about. . .
Tuesday, March 2, 2010
37 weeks (Two weeks until C-Section!!)
If N doesn't come earlier, he'll already be born two weeks from now. . . Wow!!
N scares me sometimes. He doesn't like to move at 8 am. I think he must really be asleep. However, after I eat some breakfast, he'll move quite a bit around 10 am. He's still very active between 8 pm and midnight now.
At my OB last Thursday, it was confirmed that N is head down. I do feel his head bumping my pelvis sometimes. Mostly I feel his little bottom bouncing, and his feet under my ribs. . . although he's getting a little big for this activity now.
The OB scared me by saying that my fundal height was a couple of week behind, but they tested, and I was not leaking amniotic fluid. Also, she measured me lying my back. Even with the baby, we all spread out to the sides. I measured myself later while sitting up, and I measured two weeks ahead. I have read, too, that after about 34 weeks, fundal height isn't a concern anymore. Apparently my OB doesn't know that, and that makes me a little nervous.
At 2 am this morning, I woke up sure I was going to throw up, but it was "just" major acid reflux. It burned my throat in major way. I ate Tums, but then also had to go and have just a little rice milk to coat my throat before I could even attempt to go back to sleep propped up on a pile of pillows. I haven't had many problems at all until recently with acid reflux/heartburn. I've also developed a huge a amount of gas in the last five days. It may be all related.
As well, my breasts have become much more tender in the last week. They are also extremely sensitive. Is labor coming soon? Will we make it to the scheduled c-section.
My DH, who was concerned about me having the baby too early is now worried that they've scheduled the c-section for a late date. "Shouldn't they do the c-section at 38 weeks instead of 39?" is his question. Unless there is another problem or I go into true labor earlier, the policy of my OB office is to do a planned c-section at 39 weeks. My DH also refuses to try s** as a method of getting labor going. I've reminded him that if I go into labor they would do the c-section at that time. Anyway, if he really wants me to, I have to get my nesting instinct going again (I lost it about a month ago) so I can get all the cleaning done - and then I will go on some nice long walks to try to speed things up.
N scares me sometimes. He doesn't like to move at 8 am. I think he must really be asleep. However, after I eat some breakfast, he'll move quite a bit around 10 am. He's still very active between 8 pm and midnight now.
At my OB last Thursday, it was confirmed that N is head down. I do feel his head bumping my pelvis sometimes. Mostly I feel his little bottom bouncing, and his feet under my ribs. . . although he's getting a little big for this activity now.
The OB scared me by saying that my fundal height was a couple of week behind, but they tested, and I was not leaking amniotic fluid. Also, she measured me lying my back. Even with the baby, we all spread out to the sides. I measured myself later while sitting up, and I measured two weeks ahead. I have read, too, that after about 34 weeks, fundal height isn't a concern anymore. Apparently my OB doesn't know that, and that makes me a little nervous.
At 2 am this morning, I woke up sure I was going to throw up, but it was "just" major acid reflux. It burned my throat in major way. I ate Tums, but then also had to go and have just a little rice milk to coat my throat before I could even attempt to go back to sleep propped up on a pile of pillows. I haven't had many problems at all until recently with acid reflux/heartburn. I've also developed a huge a amount of gas in the last five days. It may be all related.
As well, my breasts have become much more tender in the last week. They are also extremely sensitive. Is labor coming soon? Will we make it to the scheduled c-section.
My DH, who was concerned about me having the baby too early is now worried that they've scheduled the c-section for a late date. "Shouldn't they do the c-section at 38 weeks instead of 39?" is his question. Unless there is another problem or I go into true labor earlier, the policy of my OB office is to do a planned c-section at 39 weeks. My DH also refuses to try s** as a method of getting labor going. I've reminded him that if I go into labor they would do the c-section at that time. Anyway, if he really wants me to, I have to get my nesting instinct going again (I lost it about a month ago) so I can get all the cleaning done - and then I will go on some nice long walks to try to speed things up.
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
N is awake . . .
. . . and it is only 4 pm. He really has been waking up more around 9/10 pm. I am very sure that about five minutes ago, he woke up. I had been active - I was outside repotting some plants. Maybe that is the reason why? He just passed two kick counts in just these past five minutes. Will he be very active when he's awake after he comes out?
I have also come to a decision to continue this blog after N is born.
I have also come to a decision to continue this blog after N is born.
Monday, February 22, 2010
36 weeks (36? Really??)
36 weeks tomorrow!!
My c-section is scheduled three weeks from tomorrow morning!!
I apologize for all of the exclamation points. . . but it is just amazing to think about.
That said, I have been having more moments of panic. I suppose it is because I actively read the MISS board, and there are so many moms there whose babies were born still. I worry when N moves a lot for a while and then suddenly stops (he really probably does need a nap after all of that movement). I worry when I don't feel him for a couple of hours. I poke at him. He usually does "kick" back. On Saturday, I was in tears because it took a little to get him to respond in the morning. This morning he was pretty quiet, too, but I've come to a little peace that he really does seem to sleep in the morning. He's definitely more active in the afternoon and evening.
I think he's mostly head down again, but I am not sure.
We had a funny thing happen on Saturday. My husband said on his Facebook as status update: "Getting ready for the birth of our baby boy." Suddenly my mom was IMing me wondering what DH meant by this. . . that was a sign of things to come. DH was texted by a person or two asking if I was in labor, and on Facebook, people were wondering if I was really in labor?? NO!! I haven't even had much in the way of Braxton-Hicks (with my pregnancy with Sam, I did not get any BH contractions until 37 weeks along, around the time I started losing my mucous plug!)
What my husband meant is that we already went shopping together and picked up a few things for the baby. . . such as a mattress pad (the crib is now made up, complete with angelcare monitor and a sage green "Classic" Pooh sheet), wipes, green baby-size hangers, some small waterproof pads, bottles brushes, and nursing pads (for me).
My friends at church, in the bell choir, have a "pool" of sorts going - but no money involved. It's just for fun . . . everyone has a guess of the actual date N will arrive (if we don't go until March 16) and N's weight! People guessed between 6 lbs even all the way up to 9 lbs.
My next OB appointment is on Thursday morning. Will they ever do a NST? I was already having them by now with Sam. Maybe this is what a "normal" pregnancy is like? Also, since I AM planning on a repeat c-section, does a GBS swab need to be done? I don't mind avoiding it, in all actuality.
My c-section is scheduled three weeks from tomorrow morning!!
I apologize for all of the exclamation points. . . but it is just amazing to think about.
That said, I have been having more moments of panic. I suppose it is because I actively read the MISS board, and there are so many moms there whose babies were born still. I worry when N moves a lot for a while and then suddenly stops (he really probably does need a nap after all of that movement). I worry when I don't feel him for a couple of hours. I poke at him. He usually does "kick" back. On Saturday, I was in tears because it took a little to get him to respond in the morning. This morning he was pretty quiet, too, but I've come to a little peace that he really does seem to sleep in the morning. He's definitely more active in the afternoon and evening.
I think he's mostly head down again, but I am not sure.
We had a funny thing happen on Saturday. My husband said on his Facebook as status update: "Getting ready for the birth of our baby boy." Suddenly my mom was IMing me wondering what DH meant by this. . . that was a sign of things to come. DH was texted by a person or two asking if I was in labor, and on Facebook, people were wondering if I was really in labor?? NO!! I haven't even had much in the way of Braxton-Hicks (with my pregnancy with Sam, I did not get any BH contractions until 37 weeks along, around the time I started losing my mucous plug!)
What my husband meant is that we already went shopping together and picked up a few things for the baby. . . such as a mattress pad (the crib is now made up, complete with angelcare monitor and a sage green "Classic" Pooh sheet), wipes, green baby-size hangers, some small waterproof pads, bottles brushes, and nursing pads (for me).
My friends at church, in the bell choir, have a "pool" of sorts going - but no money involved. It's just for fun . . . everyone has a guess of the actual date N will arrive (if we don't go until March 16) and N's weight! People guessed between 6 lbs even all the way up to 9 lbs.
My next OB appointment is on Thursday morning. Will they ever do a NST? I was already having them by now with Sam. Maybe this is what a "normal" pregnancy is like? Also, since I AM planning on a repeat c-section, does a GBS swab need to be done? I don't mind avoiding it, in all actuality.
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
Ronald McDonald House outside of Hope Children's Hospital
I finally found photos online of the Ronald McDonald House that was literally just a "hole in the ground" the winter of '07-'08 when Sam lived in Hope. We could see this hold in the ground from his room. I remember looking out to see it snowing and blowing so often that winter. The early spring morning Sam died, it was sunny when the sun rose. I was finally holding my baby without any tubes or cords. He was starting to turn a little purple by the time of sunrise.
Anyway, we stayed for almost for 3.5 months at a local motel with the help of the hospital's social worker. It was what they were able to offer us as there was not a Ronald McDonald house at the time. All there was, that entire bitterly cold winter, was a hole in the ground. I can still picture it so clearly. . . often I parked on that side of the street when I came to be with Sam. I recognize the trees. . .
Here are the pictures of the place now: http://activerain.com/blogsview/1330491/ronald-mcdonald-house-in-oak-lawn-illinois
Anyway, we stayed for almost for 3.5 months at a local motel with the help of the hospital's social worker. It was what they were able to offer us as there was not a Ronald McDonald house at the time. All there was, that entire bitterly cold winter, was a hole in the ground. I can still picture it so clearly. . . often I parked on that side of the street when I came to be with Sam. I recognize the trees. . .
Here are the pictures of the place now: http://activerain.com/blogsview/1330491/ronald-mcdonald-house-in-oak-lawn-illinois
Monday, February 15, 2010
My mother is counting down . . .
My mother (N's Grandma, of course) IM'd me on FB a few minutes ago. The message?
"Four weeks!"
Um - wow - she's right! Tomorrow I am 35 weeks along (and schedule c-section in four weeks)!! Wow! N was bouncing on my bladder already this morning. Last night, he woke up at 11:30 pm, too. I could not sleep for a while, but that's okay. I love having him inside me!
I am happy that my mother is so excited! She was really the one, beyond DH and I, that was really 'crushed' by losing Sam. For a while, she was having panic attacks every Wednesday night, recalling our calls that Sam died. More panic attacks than I had, actually. (I'm just prone to having more generalized anxiety all the time, though.) She's coming asap after N is born. I requested this. I wanted her to be able to hold N as soon as possible, because she was never permitted to hold Sam. That makes both of us cry. . . My mother and I get along very well most of the time, and she is also my BEST friend as well. I want "my mommy" to get a chance to hold our new little boy. It is so, so important!
"Four weeks!"
Um - wow - she's right! Tomorrow I am 35 weeks along (and schedule c-section in four weeks)!! Wow! N was bouncing on my bladder already this morning. Last night, he woke up at 11:30 pm, too. I could not sleep for a while, but that's okay. I love having him inside me!
I am happy that my mother is so excited! She was really the one, beyond DH and I, that was really 'crushed' by losing Sam. For a while, she was having panic attacks every Wednesday night, recalling our calls that Sam died. More panic attacks than I had, actually. (I'm just prone to having more generalized anxiety all the time, though.) She's coming asap after N is born. I requested this. I wanted her to be able to hold N as soon as possible, because she was never permitted to hold Sam. That makes both of us cry. . . My mother and I get along very well most of the time, and she is also my BEST friend as well. I want "my mommy" to get a chance to hold our new little boy. It is so, so important!
Saturday, February 13, 2010
Rotating baby and allergies
Okay, N was head down for a couple of days. Breathing for me was much improved, which is good, because where we live, the pollen count outdoors has skyrocketed in the last week (lots of trees are blooming/flowering currently)! I am allergic to most tree pollens. However, N has spent most of today rotating! He seems to be breech and up in my my ribs again. So breathing is interesting again. . .
N has a few nicknames now, beyond what we call him, depending on who you talk to. A couple of coworkers of my husband have been calling our baby BB Junior (because my husband's initials are BB) and a couple of Asian friends of mine have started calling him Tiger because he will be born in the Year of the Tiger!
N has a few nicknames now, beyond what we call him, depending on who you talk to. A couple of coworkers of my husband have been calling our baby BB Junior (because my husband's initials are BB) and a couple of Asian friends of mine have started calling him Tiger because he will be born in the Year of the Tiger!
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Dropped?
N has moved a lot this week. Three days ago, he was still definitely breech, and right up under my ribs. Two days ago he started moving a lot. I am quite sure now that he is head down, and and nowhere near my ribs. I look "less" pregnant than I did on Tuesday evening. I mean, N is kicking below my ribs, not in my ribs. In addition, for the last two nights, he's been moving actively at night between 10 pm and 1 am - and it is SO painful on my bladder - as if he is so low - and maybe on a nerve. I am almost 34.5 weeks. . . and he was measuring a week ahead, so. . .
What if I DOgo into labor before the date of the planned c-section?
We were surprised on Tuesday night - some friends gave us the angelcare movement monitor I'd been wanting! I am so grateful for good friends!
What if I DOgo into labor before the date of the planned c-section?
We were surprised on Tuesday night - some friends gave us the angelcare movement monitor I'd been wanting! I am so grateful for good friends!
Monday, February 8, 2010
34 Weeks!
34 weeks -- Five weeks until my scheduled c-section! Oh, my!
The baby has thrown off MY sleep schedule quite a bit lately. Last night, I was up until 2 am, because he was moving so much, and sitting right on my bladder - to the point that I was in pain. No contractions at all, though. He seems to still really wake up between 8 pm and 2 am. I can't tell where his head is, versus his bottom, etc, anymore. I can just tell he's getting big and gaining weight!
I had a very small baby shower tonight. . . I really don't prefer to have a big, formal shower, because frankly, it would make me nervous. (We may have "meet the baby" party after he's born.) Some friends in my church handbell group had a small shower for me tonight after rehearsal. They are getting us a rocking chair (Or maybe a glider, not sure, actually)! This was one of the "larger" things on my list of wants! It will be here by Sunday. I am so excited!
I have another OB appt on Friday. We haven't done a NST yet. I wonder when those will start. Maybe I will ask if she doesn't bring it up.
The baby has thrown off MY sleep schedule quite a bit lately. Last night, I was up until 2 am, because he was moving so much, and sitting right on my bladder - to the point that I was in pain. No contractions at all, though. He seems to still really wake up between 8 pm and 2 am. I can't tell where his head is, versus his bottom, etc, anymore. I can just tell he's getting big and gaining weight!
I had a very small baby shower tonight. . . I really don't prefer to have a big, formal shower, because frankly, it would make me nervous. (We may have "meet the baby" party after he's born.) Some friends in my church handbell group had a small shower for me tonight after rehearsal. They are getting us a rocking chair (Or maybe a glider, not sure, actually)! This was one of the "larger" things on my list of wants! It will be here by Sunday. I am so excited!
I have another OB appt on Friday. We haven't done a NST yet. I wonder when those will start. Maybe I will ask if she doesn't bring it up.
Sunday, January 31, 2010
Slight Panic Last Night
N is fine and moving today, but last night as I laid on my right side, I felt very rhythmic movement. My husband could feel it, too. N had the hiccups! Once upon a time, I might have thought that was cute. . . but I know now that for some people whose babies have been born still, their babies had the hiccups a lot in utero. It may have been sign of distress. So now I worry. This WAS the first time that I was aware that N had the hiccups. Maybe he's gotten them other times and I was not aware. So now I worry. Last night when I turned over to my left side, the hiccups stopped. It was a relief, frankly.
Today N is very active again! He's getting big, so I feel him a lot. I still don't "feel" as large as I did at this point with Sam, maybe because I had too much anmiotic fluid with Sam. I have a "normal" amount with this little one.
Today N is very active again! He's getting big, so I feel him a lot. I still don't "feel" as large as I did at this point with Sam, maybe because I had too much anmiotic fluid with Sam. I have a "normal" amount with this little one.
Friday, January 29, 2010
Sam's Hospital Records
We finally got copies of Sam's hospital records. They STILL did not send the genetic reports!! (Rather steamed about that, but I digress. . . )
I am reading the report of Sam's Cardiac Catherization done just two days before he died. Here is the "Final Diagnosis" from that report:
1) Double outlet right ventricle with mitral atresia, severely hypoplastic left ventricle, subaortic and aortic stenosis, coarctation of aorta and atretic right pulmonary veins.
2)Status post Norwood with Sano modification using a 6-mm Gore-Tex patch from the right ventricle to pulmonary arteries.
3) Chronic respiratory failure with ongoing hypercapnia with pCO2s at least in the 70s regardless of mode of ventilation.
4) Decreased oxygenation from combination of decreased pulmonary flow and increased pathology of the left lower lung, and nonfuctioning right lung.
5) Status post extracorporeal membrane oxygenation (ECMO) support.
6) Occluded iliac veins bilaterally and probably the distal inferior vena cava.
7) Bilateral superior vena cava with no communicating vein.
8) Excellent right ventricular function and no coarctation of aorta.
So. . .
At least #8 was excellent. . . the rest sounds pretty grim, and it was.
I just want to cry.
I am reading the report of Sam's Cardiac Catherization done just two days before he died. Here is the "Final Diagnosis" from that report:
1) Double outlet right ventricle with mitral atresia, severely hypoplastic left ventricle, subaortic and aortic stenosis, coarctation of aorta and atretic right pulmonary veins.
2)Status post Norwood with Sano modification using a 6-mm Gore-Tex patch from the right ventricle to pulmonary arteries.
3) Chronic respiratory failure with ongoing hypercapnia with pCO2s at least in the 70s regardless of mode of ventilation.
4) Decreased oxygenation from combination of decreased pulmonary flow and increased pathology of the left lower lung, and nonfuctioning right lung.
5) Status post extracorporeal membrane oxygenation (ECMO) support.
6) Occluded iliac veins bilaterally and probably the distal inferior vena cava.
7) Bilateral superior vena cava with no communicating vein.
8) Excellent right ventricular function and no coarctation of aorta.
So. . .
At least #8 was excellent. . . the rest sounds pretty grim, and it was.
I just want to cry.
Thursday, January 28, 2010
Meeting with Pediatrician and Tired
I met with a pediatrician today, and so far I really like her. I think we'll probably go with her, too. She is perfectly fine with us holding off on the Hep B vaccine for the baby for at least the first few months, which is what I want to do.
She also highly recommended the book Baby 411. So I will probably buy the book eventually.
I am so tired today. I have had so much energy recently that this tiredness has me a little frustrated. I think I am hungry, too. I might sample a little supper, even if it means nuking some first.
I plan to put some of what I am making in the freezer, so when I am in the hospital my husband can bring it to me (if they can't make me food I can eat there).
She also highly recommended the book Baby 411. So I will probably buy the book eventually.
I am so tired today. I have had so much energy recently that this tiredness has me a little frustrated. I think I am hungry, too. I might sample a little supper, even if it means nuking some first.
I plan to put some of what I am making in the freezer, so when I am in the hospital my husband can bring it to me (if they can't make me food I can eat there).
32 Weeks (33??)
I am gestationally 32 weeks as of two days ago. However, at the fetal echo ultrasound yesterday, N was measuring at a 33-week size! He is approximately 4 lbs, 2 oz! So, if he follows the "normal" chart of growth, and is born at 39 (gestational age) weeks, he should be about 7.5 lbs, just like his older brother! I am personally guessing up a little, so maybe 8lbs.
The sonographer used the word "boring". N is boring which is wonderful! She said she loves to see "boringly normal" babies. I do, too!! Yay for N!! Boring is such a nice word to hear in our case!
N did keep moving and jiggling during the entire ultrasound. His head was up right under my sternum and his butt down on my bladder. Last night he was waking me up again with huge movements. This morning, I think his feet are in my left side.
This afternoon, I am interviewing a pediatrician that the pediatric cardiologist highly recommended. Tomorrow, I have my next OB appointment.
My DH is getting nervous. He wants to practice driving to the hospital where I am having the baby.
The sonographer used the word "boring". N is boring which is wonderful! She said she loves to see "boringly normal" babies. I do, too!! Yay for N!! Boring is such a nice word to hear in our case!
N did keep moving and jiggling during the entire ultrasound. His head was up right under my sternum and his butt down on my bladder. Last night he was waking me up again with huge movements. This morning, I think his feet are in my left side.
This afternoon, I am interviewing a pediatrician that the pediatric cardiologist highly recommended. Tomorrow, I have my next OB appointment.
My DH is getting nervous. He wants to practice driving to the hospital where I am having the baby.
Friday, January 22, 2010
N's Movement and cloth diapers
N has been moving regularly the last few days, so no real moments of panic. I should say, I have been feeling him move regularly in the last couple of days. He gyrating right now in fact.
I spent part of the day with a friend who showed me her collection of cloth diapers, and the differing kinds available. I am still not sure if I am going to pursue this route or not.
I spent part of the day with a friend who showed me her collection of cloth diapers, and the differing kinds available. I am still not sure if I am going to pursue this route or not.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
31 Weeks
I had a scare earlier this afternoon -- I couldn't get the baby to move even with eating an apple. Or at least, moving enough to satisfy me. He must have been taking an afternoon nap. However, for the last 30 minutes, he must be awake! He's just moving and moving right now, although I don't think he's changed out of his breech position yet. I feel like I am sleeping on him at night with the way he's in my sides so much.
On another issue, we've been trying so hard to acquire some of the records of Sam from the hospital he was in, for our present pediatric cardiologist to take a look at. It would have been so much easier if I had been able to just walk in with my ID. As it is, since we live 1800 miles away now, I had to fill out a form after they took their time sending it to me, and then scan and print my ID. Then mailed the form. Then they took 3 whole weeks just to mail a "quote" of price. I received this today. We need the records one week from today. . . I am calling tomorrow morning, pay by credit card over the phone, and ask that the records be mailed tomorrow!! It would have been so much easier if I could have faxed or emailed .pdfs. . . but they were very unreasonable about it.
On another issue, we've been trying so hard to acquire some of the records of Sam from the hospital he was in, for our present pediatric cardiologist to take a look at. It would have been so much easier if I had been able to just walk in with my ID. As it is, since we live 1800 miles away now, I had to fill out a form after they took their time sending it to me, and then scan and print my ID. Then mailed the form. Then they took 3 whole weeks just to mail a "quote" of price. I received this today. We need the records one week from today. . . I am calling tomorrow morning, pay by credit card over the phone, and ask that the records be mailed tomorrow!! It would have been so much easier if I could have faxed or emailed .pdfs. . . but they were very unreasonable about it.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
30 Weeks, Part 2
Oops - forgot to post after my appointment!
C-Section is scheduled for March 16!! Unless N decides that it's time earlier. My DH is telling the baby that March 12 would be better! Um, no. I have been telling the baby from early on that he needs to have his own birthday, and that I want my own birthday. Yes, March 12 is MY birthday.
C-Section is scheduled for March 16!! Unless N decides that it's time earlier. My DH is telling the baby that March 12 would be better! Um, no. I have been telling the baby from early on that he needs to have his own birthday, and that I want my own birthday. Yes, March 12 is MY birthday.
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
30 Weeks, Part 1
Thirty weeks today. N is jiggling and dancing again tonight in my right side mostly. He seems to like it over there. I can't quite tell where his head is, however.
We had an emotional time last night and today. I went through some baby things, some of which Sam wore in the hospital. A couple of things were added to the things we will keep, that we have pictures of Sam. N will not wear these items. One cute little outfit my husband does not remember Sam wearing, so he thought we could use it for N. However, I remembered Sam in the outfit. Sam wore it less than a week before he died - when my husband got to hold Sam finally. I had to look at the pictures to verify that it was this very outfit. It was. So that one, too, N will not wear.
Tomorrow is my next OB appointment. We hope to get the c-section scheduled! It's all coming up so quickly now!
Early this morning, I had a dream in which I was eating lots of food, and then drinking lots of ice water. I woke up extremely thirsty!
I will write a 30 Weeks, Part 2 post tomorrow after my appointment.
We had an emotional time last night and today. I went through some baby things, some of which Sam wore in the hospital. A couple of things were added to the things we will keep, that we have pictures of Sam. N will not wear these items. One cute little outfit my husband does not remember Sam wearing, so he thought we could use it for N. However, I remembered Sam in the outfit. Sam wore it less than a week before he died - when my husband got to hold Sam finally. I had to look at the pictures to verify that it was this very outfit. It was. So that one, too, N will not wear.
Tomorrow is my next OB appointment. We hope to get the c-section scheduled! It's all coming up so quickly now!
Early this morning, I had a dream in which I was eating lots of food, and then drinking lots of ice water. I woke up extremely thirsty!
I will write a 30 Weeks, Part 2 post tomorrow after my appointment.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
29 Weeks
My parents have been visiting for the last week, so I have not been able to post until now.
Until today, for the last 9 days or so, N has been lying breech, with his head right below my ribs on the right side, and his butt on the left. His feet were dancing on my bladder. I had an ultrasound last week, so this position was confirmed, and I could feel his head on the right side since then.
Today, N has been moving constantly since noon. For a while, and even now, I could really feel him punching my sternum. Is he head down and feet up? I don't feel nearly so "wide" as I have for the last week, but shorter of breath!
Last week at 28 weeks, N was estimated at 2lbs, 6oz! A friend of mine is teasing me that I will be having a 10lb baby! I hope not. I am hoping for a very healthy 8 pounder.
My parents bought us a crib. It is a relatively simple crib, with rounded edges. We are putting the baby in our room for now, and we have limited space for the crib.
Last night, another friend told me that the way I am carrying the baby, I should be having a girl. She asked me if I was SURE I am having a boy. Well, what if three ultrasounds are wrong?? We have lots of "boy" stuff. If we were expecting a girl, I would go with a purple and pink "theme" instead of Winnie the Pooh!
Until today, for the last 9 days or so, N has been lying breech, with his head right below my ribs on the right side, and his butt on the left. His feet were dancing on my bladder. I had an ultrasound last week, so this position was confirmed, and I could feel his head on the right side since then.
Today, N has been moving constantly since noon. For a while, and even now, I could really feel him punching my sternum. Is he head down and feet up? I don't feel nearly so "wide" as I have for the last week, but shorter of breath!
Last week at 28 weeks, N was estimated at 2lbs, 6oz! A friend of mine is teasing me that I will be having a 10lb baby! I hope not. I am hoping for a very healthy 8 pounder.
My parents bought us a crib. It is a relatively simple crib, with rounded edges. We are putting the baby in our room for now, and we have limited space for the crib.
Last night, another friend told me that the way I am carrying the baby, I should be having a girl. She asked me if I was SURE I am having a boy. Well, what if three ultrasounds are wrong?? We have lots of "boy" stuff. If we were expecting a girl, I would go with a purple and pink "theme" instead of Winnie the Pooh!
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